Thursday, July 7, 2016
A New Journey
Corey and I went to the fertility doctor's office last Friday. I had already told myself that no matter what the outcome was, it was in God's hands and I needed to have Faith. As I took a deep breath I looked at the scripture my doctor has on his wall, and I knew that our baby whenever it comes would be an absolute miracle. As the doctor started to let us know that my right tube is unable to work and the only way we could get pregnant was through IVF, I kept remembering that voice asking me if I trusted him. I started to have a peaceful feeling that everything would bebok, and to trust him. I knew in that second that my Heavenly Father was there, reminding me to have Faith.
Then the doctor mentioned a study for IVF they were doing the medicine and everything was included and covered. Could this be an answer to all our many prayers? My heart skipped a beat until he let me know that I qualified for everything except the weight.
That is never fun to hear, but then I found myself telling my doctor that I would get down to the weight needed. I will do anything for a baby. He gave me a meal plan of 6 meals 200 calories each and gave me a sort of deadline. He also gave me an appetite suppressant that is supposed to take away my hunger and give me energy. With PCOS unfortunately it is hard for us to lose wait, so I am also on pills to regulate my body. Since I have started this diet I have been able to take those pills, which is a huge blessing. Usually they make me so sick. This is another reason why I know this journey is being led by Heavenly Father.
So here we go on another journey. Yet I honestly feel that this is more of a hopeful journey. I know nothing is guaranteed in life, but I also know that some things are meant to happen in your life. Will it be hard, of course it will. I am on day 3 of this diet and honestly it's not always easy, but in the end it will be worth it no matter what. My two motivations in this are qualifying for the study and being healthy. I pray every day that Heavenly Father will help me through this. I know that this will only make me better and also strengthen my Faith even more.
As I look back on this journey I see God"s hand in everything. Of course questions arise as to why didn't they find out my tube didn't work earlier? Maybe the reason is I needed to face my biggest fear of giving myself shots, maybe it was just a practice run for if we get the chance to do IVF. Whatever it was, it was meant to happen. I believe with all my heart in the power Faith and prayer have. They have gotten my through the hardest times of this journey. He has put amazing friends and family in my life as a huge support system. I am truly humbled by the love, support and prayers from everyone. I know that this journey has given me one of my most precious gifts and that is strengthened Faith and trust in Heavenly Father. I have grown so much spiritually throughout this journey. Without my Faith I would be a lost mess.
Going into this I am going to choose Faith over fear. I know days will be hard, but I also know what I have been promised. I also know that my Heavenly Father loves me, and I know that with him & my family by my side I can get through anything. God makes the impossible possible.
Thank you everyone who has stuck with us through this journey. You will never know how much your prayers and kind words mean to us. We feel your prayers and it strengthens us. This journey is not yet over, but I want you all to know how much you mean to us. So thank you from the bottom of our hearts, we love you!
If you have any low calorie meal ideas or snacks let me know
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