With Faith, Hope, and Love Nothing is Impossible!!

                    So yesterday I had the feeling that I needed to post about the thoughts that are rolling around in my head. So here it goes. I have felt the Spirit so strong lately, and it brings my heart so much peace and joy. I am not going to go into detail about some of the things I have heard or felt, but just know God loves us and is involved in every detail of our lives.

                     I was driving to church yesterday when all of the sudden a light bulb went off in my head. An answer to a prayer that I have been searching for what seems like forever. Why do I have to deal with infertility? This has been one of the hardest challenges in my life, so why me Heavenly Father? It was yesterday driving to church that I received what I think is the answer to that burning question. I know you can handle it, you fight and never give up for all those you love or what you want. In that very moment a peaceful feeling came over me, and tears rolled down my cheeks. God wasn't punishing me, I have done nothing wrong. In fact I look at it, as he has so much Faith in me that he knows I will make it through this! For along time I have been somewhat angry with him, but those feelings of sadness and anger went away in that very moment. I have a whole new perspective on why this is happening to me. 
                  
                   So what now? Since Heavenly Father has given me this trial with confidence knowing I will never in fact give up, I am going to make him proud. I won't give up on my dreams of being a mother, I will learn what I need to learn through this trial, and in the end I will come out a better person. For I know I am a daughter of God! He loves me, he is involved in every detail of my life and through him I will be blessed. When I don't know, but I know that God always keeps his promises. Nothing is impossible through Faith, Hope, and Love.
                  
                   Right now I am learning and growing so much through the things he has taught me through the Holy Ghost. I feel through this trial I have learned to have more of a Father daughter relationship with him then I have ever had before. When I pray I feel him listening intently to my heart and soul. I hear his words to have peace, patience, and faith. This warms my heart like never before. He knows I want to be a mother, he knows the desires of my heart, and he is working behind the scenes to make his promise fulfilled to me. What an amazing blessing we have to talk to our Father in Heaven. He is always there for us. He loves us, and wants to protect us. He wants us to have the righteous desires of our hearts. So during those times of pain and struggles, remember this one thing. God loves you with all of his heart. When you truly believe that it will change your heart, it will cause you to have the trust and faith in him you need. Your heart will be changed forever, and you will realize he doesn't give you struggles to hurt you, but to help strengthen you. He has so much Faith in us, and knows we can get through it with his help.
                    
                  I am still learning, and growing through this trial. My heart is full of gratitude to my Heavenly Father for trusting in me, and having Faith that I can make it. There will still be hard days, there will still be sadness, but I know that through God's never ending love I can do this! I am a daughter of God, and with his help miracles do happen!

Feeling Blessed!!!

I haven't written on here for awhile, so I decided for a New Year's resolution to start writing a post at least once a month. Obviously I missed January so I am going to try much harder to meet this goal!
    
     My journey to having a baby has not been easy, but one thing has always stayed constant. My Heavenly Father has always been right there on the journey with me, at time I know he has even carried me through my darkest times. He is always there at times reassuring me through my dreams, or by just entering thoughts in my mind. I have had so many spiritual experiences that  I could never doubt the love my Heavenly Father has for me.
     
       On Saturday I was driving to my mom's house when all of the sudden I felt this strong reassurance that he was there, and he knows what my heart desires most. He then reminded me through my thoughts some of the things I have been told through this experience. Then I recieved a scripture that really made me think.
Moroni 7:42
Wherefore, if a man have faith he must needs have hope; for without faith there cannot be any hope.

         This scripture really stood out to me, and was an answer to a prayer. Maybe just then Heavenly Father was trying to tell me, I needed to have hope again. Those two principles go hand in hand, so if I was losing Hope was I losing my Faith also? The Lord knew at that very time that my small ray of hope was dimming. He knew that my heart was starting to break all over again, and he knew what I needed. That scripture may seem small to some people, but to me it made all the difference in the world.
        I have had so many dreams lately of children lately, and those are strong reminders that the Lord is always there. He is always there, even when we don't know it! Always hold on to this Faith, and assurance that he is there. This will help you and will be a great comfort.

 

Hope

  So I know it's been forever since I have written on here. I think it's because when I first started this blog it was a way to vent all my emotional feelings. In the past little while I haven't felt the need to do so. I feel more at peace then I have in a long time. I think I am really growing and learning how to trust God.
    I have always known that God loves me. I have always known that I am a child of god, so what has changed? I haven't quite put my finger on the reason, yet in my heart I feel a great change within me.
    My heart feels fuller and more at peace. Although my arms still yearn for a baby of our own. I know with all of my heart that one day our dream of that will come true. How do I know this you ask? Because I have Faith that my Heavenly father answers my prayers. Faith that he knows what the desires of my heart are, and faith that he always keeps his promises.
     This has not been the easiest thing to learn. I have had my struggles, frustrations, and a whole lot of tears through out this process. A process that I would never in a million years thought I would have to go through. I have learned so much through this journey, and my husband and I have stayed strong. It hasn't been easy. My heart has been torn in half and broken for a long time now. My tears have stained my pillows, and sometimes I have become numb. What gets me through all this heartache and pain is my Faith in prayer.
     Prayer to a Heavenly Father who loves me, and who has promised me that one day our dream will come true. One day we will hold a beautiful child, and our hearts will be full. Prayer can be such a powerful thing. I have learned so much through my personal prayers with Heavenly Father.
     I have had my good days and bad days. Mother's Day is always the hardest for me, each year it gets harder and harder. The ache never truly goes away, but each day I feel a little stronger. For now I just have Faith and leave my life in God's hands.

What I have Learned

Wow I can't believe it has been this long since i have posted. Corey and I celebrated our 6th Anniversary on October 6th! Crazy how time flies! Other then that not much else has happened. I have been writing my book a little more, and we were still giving our selves a break from trying to have a baby.

In this time I have learned alot about myself. I have also realized more how much Heavenly
Father knows what we need, and when we need it!
I really learned that this week at work. I got a promotion at my job. It is a job I have been wanting, but I never pushed myself to apply for it . Now I know why. It wasn't the right time for me. So now I really realize, Heavenly Father knows more of when things are right for me, then I do. He really does mean that things will happen when the time is right, but it's not my timing it's his. So the best thing for me is to just let it go, and trust that he is going to let it happen when he knows the timing is right for me. I just really need to strengthen my Faith in him, and find out what he wants me to learn during this time. For so long it's like you say ok I am giving it to him, but are you really? Giving it to him means not that you give up, but that you are letting him take the load for awhile. That you are also saying to him, ok I am going to keep on doing what I need to, but I am not going to worry if it does or doesn't happen. Also saying I know you will do what is best for me right now, because I trust you with everything.
So for now I am giving Heavenly Father the load, and saying what do I need to learn right now?

Gratitude

So I just finished a book the other day, Not My Type by Melanie Jacobson. It was not only a funny romantic comedy, but it also has a good message in it. In the book the main character's father challenges her to write a thank you note to a different person every week. He tells her."If you can focus on the things you do have, the things that are going right for you, then maybe you won't worry so much about the things that sometimes don't." I think that is so true. Sometimes I think we get more caught up in the things we don't have rather then remembering the things we do have. We forget that we actually have so much to be grateful for. We forget as the book says that we have alot of things going right in our lives. I think if we would show more gratitude towards people, it could make a big difference in our lives. It would show us we truly do have things we have been blessed with. Our attitudes, and hearts would change.

Gratitude

So I just finished a book the other day, Not My Type by Melanie Jacobson. It was not only a funny romantic comedy, but it also has a good message in it. In the book the main character's father challenges her to write a thank you note to a different person every week. He tells her."If you can focus on the things you do have, the things that are going right for you, then maybe you won't worry so much about the things that sometimes don't." I think that is so true. Sometimes I think we get more caught up in the things we don't have rather then remembering the things we do have. We forget that we actually have so much to be grateful for. We forget as the book says that we have alot of things going right in our lives. I think if we would show more gratitude towards people, it could make a big difference in our lives. It would show us we truly do have things we have been blessed with. Our attitudes, and hearts would change.

Spiritual Patterns

I want to start this one off by saying, I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father. Sometimes we don't think Heavenly Father knows what is best for us. We want to have all the control, and we think things should come when we want them to. Heavenly Father sees the whole picture, where we do not. He knows when we need certain people or things to come into our lives. I remember before I met Corey. I was scared I would never find a husband. That trial at the time was a big test of my Faith. I wrote in my journal about a blessing I had. In the blessing it said that I would need this Faith for future trials in my life, and that I would see a pattern in this. Here I am 8 years later, and I am seeing that pattern again. So why do I fear? The last time I had a trial like this I recieved the most amazing reward, my husband. Sometimes we just need to step back and say ok Heavenly Father I trust you, and I leave this in your hands. You know whats best for me, and I need to trust that.