Sunday, April 19, 2015

My Jorney and what I am learning!

                        So I have had a lot of people ask how things went on Wednesday, so I decided to write a recap of this last month. I wanted to document this journey not only to help others along the way, but to remind us of it is well. We have and are still learning so much from this journey. We want to thank everyone once again for supporting, loving, and praying for us. Without your love and support we couldn't get through this.


                        Round 2: Last month we were not able to do the IUI. The medicine worked and everything, just on the wrong side. So here we are now in the middle of round 2. Each round is very precise and has it's own calendar. It always consists of  ultrasounds, medicines, and injections.

                       The first ultrasound checks everything to give us the go ahead to move forward. Then comes the worst part for me anyway, the bravelle injection shot. For those of you who know me, know that I am deathly afraid of needles, so boy have I learned through this. My mom had given it to me last month, but she was away in Oklahoma. So it was all up to me.

                         I woke up at 5:30 that morning and prepared for battle. I got the medicine all ready, numbed the heck out of my skin with ice and popped it in. I was actually so proud of myself, I had actually done it. That was huge for me, I was just glad it was over. That injection definitely isn't my favorite it makes me ache, hungry, moody, and just plain hurts. So I went to work prepared with my rice packs I had frozen. Those helped out.

                        The next day comes the ultrasound where they check the follicles to see if the eggs are growing. Unfortunately it hadn't grown enough so another ultrasound was scheduled the next Monday. I was sad, and almost lost hope. Then I felt a voice telling me to have Faith, that all was not lost.  Monday came and I remember praying extra hard and asking my friends and family for prayers. I know how strong the power of prayers are, and I needed all the strength I could get. I said a little prayer before the nurse came in to do the ultrasound. Then is when we got the much anticipated news, we had a follicle that had grown big enough, and we could move forward to the IUI. Words can't express the gratitude and love I felt for my Heavenly Father for getting us to that point. I felt so incredibly loved and knew that he was with me along this journey. I was also so grateful to everyone for their prayers and support. Heavenly Father was placed so many wonderful and amazing people in our lives that have always been there for us. My heart felt so full and my faith was strengthened.

                       I was told I needed to give myself an HCG shot that releases the eggs. I was told this needed to happen at 9:00 p.m. I was nervous, scared, but ready to take on this new challenge. Before it was time I said a quick prayer and went to preparing for the injection. I learned a very valuable lesson with this one though. I started to do the injection just like the lady showed me, when all the sudden I couldn't get the fluid into the syringe, so I completely panicked. I called my mom in a complete panic, and she offered to come over and help me. Right then I learned that if there is something Satan doesn't want to happen, he will do anything to stop it. He was there making me doubt myself, panic, and worry. It wasn't until I took a step back and realized what was going on that I could hear the Holy Ghost whisper and tell me what to do. I needed to have faith and believe in myself and know that I could do this. I calmed myself down and called my sister Allie. She walked me through and I was able to get the fluid into the syringe. I then called my mom to let her know I had figured it out, and she stayed on the phone with me until I had given myself the shot. Her love support and reassurance that I could do it helped me accomplish it. I am so incredibly grateful and blessed to have her.

                      Wednesday was the big day. I remember waking up with so much excitement, nervousness and pure joy that this could finally happen. Corey and I made the drive down to Pleasant Grove for the procedure. I remember it was snowing pretty hard and I prayed for the Lord to help me remember how to get back to the center, because we had gone to breakfast before and didn't know how to get back there. We aren't very familiar to Pleasant Grove, so I was a little worried. We went down a couple of roads I was guided to go down, and sure enough we found it again. I knew that it was my Heavenly Father that guided us back to where we needed to be. I said a little prayer before the procedure began letting my Heavenly Father know that I was leaving this in his hands, and that if it be his will that this would work. The procedure went well, and now we are left to wait until the 29th of April to find out if it worked.

                    I honestly don't know if this will work, but I have Faith that whatever is supposed to happen will. Heavenly Father has made me promises and I know they will happen, but in his time not mine. I know that through it all he has been right by my side. He has wiped away my tears, calmed my fears, strengthened my Faith, and helped my heart to grow. I know he is there, I know he loves me, and I know with all my heart that he is my father. My faith has grown so much during this trial, and I know that I was meant to have it. The Lord works in mysterious ways, but he always knows what's best for us. I have learned to trust him with all my heart. This trial has only strengthened my testimony that he lives, that he loves me, and that his son, my Savior Jesus Christ has experienced everything I am going through. whether big or small. I know that one day I will be a mom, and I can't wait for that day. I have had many blessing given to me through out this, and I have truly felt the power of the priesthood. I feel so very blessed and grateful to have it in my life. One thing is always so constant in every blessing and that is that he loves me and that he hears my prayers. What amazing words of comfort, faith, hope and love. I am his daughter and he knows the desires of my heart. This knowledge gives me so much comfort and helps me through each day. I am so grateful for the strength and courage he has given me through all of this. I know that this trial is not yet over, but I also know that with his help I can get through anything. We are leaving this in our Heavenly Father's hands, what better place for it to be in. If I could help anyone going through this I would tell them this never ever give up, keep going, and keep the hope alive in your heart no matter what. Also have Faith in your Heavenly Father and trust in his plan for you. Always remember that with him by your side you can get through anything. Thank you all for being on this journey with us. Thank you for your love, prayers and support. We feel every single one of them. Our hearts are full of love and appreciation to you all!


                
                      
                       

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